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COMMUNICATING THE WISDOM THAT'S CHANGING THE WORLD
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Why is it that some people seem so vital when they are older - looking and acting much younger than their years - yet others seem old before their time? What are the qualities and practices that keep us young and fit? How do we maintain passion, radiance and vitality as we age? Justine Toms and Kimberly Weichel share their wisdom and experience on these vexing questions. 1) Life-Long Learning There is a cultural assumption that some day we will grow up. Educator and author of Spot of Grace, Dawna Markova questions this assumption. She asks, "But then what?" In fact, most of us never truly feel as if we are "grown up." That is a good thing. It means that we are continuing in the process of learning. In surveys done with people who are living an active and vibrant life into their eighties, nineties, and beyond, they found that one of the most common characteristics is that they are life-long learners. No matter what their age, they continue to be excited and curious about life and about learning new things. Science has proven that the brain has the ability to re-wire itself. Thinking, learning, and acting actually change the brain's physical structure, anatomy, and functional organization. The physiology of the brain changes from top to bottom, called neuroplasticity or neurogenises. Markova says that life-long learning keeps us healthy. She states,"One of the things that keeps us growing forward is a state of wonder. This state of 'I don't know' wonder promulgates growth." Indeed, the benefits we receive when we consciously apply ourselves to lifelong learning are enormous. It can influence our health, our outlook on life, and our social interactions. A Chinese proverb states, "Learning is a treasure which will follow its owner everywhere." "In a time of drastic change it is the learners who inherit the future" --Eric Hoffer 2) Finding What Has Heart and Meaning All of us want to live a life with meaning and one of the best ways to insure that outcome is to know we are making a contribution to the lives of others. This can manifest itself in as many ways as there are people. It could be one's life work, or some volunteer work in addition to how we earn a living. It might be serving meals at a senior center, or picking up garbage in a parking lot. One might find deep satisfaction by planting milkweed in our garden thereby contributing to the health of the butterflies. What any of these activities have in common is that they take us outside ourselves. One's life opens up and becomes more joyful when contributing to the lives of others. A life filled with meaning often entails serving others in some way that has meaning both for us and for them. In these stressed-filled times our tendency may be to go into isolation. More than ever we must take great strides to connect with others rather than isolate ourselves. This will give our lives meaning, deep comfort, and a sense of belonging. As Albert Schweitzer has said, "I do not know what your destiny will be, but one thing I do know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who have sought and found how to serve." 3) Importance of Friends Friends are our support system. Growing up, friends were a big part of forming our personalities and supporting who we have become. Friends are people who like us in spite of our faults and who listen to us and tell us the truth. Friends support our decisions and tell us when we're foolish. They laugh with us and share our grief. They are companions and share our interests. They argue with us and stimulate our minds. Friends offer acceptance and emotional support. They also help occasionally with the practical aspects of day-to-day living, cooking a meal (or taking us out), helping with chores, or giving us a lift when we need one. Friends also are there to offer advice, an ear to listen, or a shoulder to cry on. Friendships help us feel connected, less isolated and help reduce stress. According to Pamela M. Peeke, MD, a professor of medicine at the University of Maryland, friends can even bolster our immune systems. There are many different forms in which to share together with friends. Beyond sharing one on one, circles are a popular way for women to share together on an ongoing basis. Jean Shinoda Bolen inspired women in her book "Millionth Circle" to form circles as vehicles of societal and psycho spiritual change. Another form is Salons - gatherings for sharing food and dialogue in homes. Salons are an enriching way to share and deepen friendships over time. "A friend is someone who knows your song and sings it to you when you have forgotten it." - An African saying 4) Take Time to Celebrate Small and Large Accomplishments One has only to look at nature to realize that it has something to say to us about the power of celebration. Have you ever wondered why there are so many different species of birds? Or so many varieties of flowers? Maybe nature is trying to tell us that this precious planet of ours is all about celebration. Award-winning architect and co-author of Cradle to Cradle: Remaking the Way We Make Things, William McDonough has suggested, "Those who celebrate the most are the true evolutionary winners. Nature is all about fierce celebration." It's important to take time to celebrate both the small and large accomplishments in our lives. Pause at the end of the day and take a moment to ask yourself, "How much did I enjoy the day?" More often than not we are looking towards the future and to all the things we must do rather than what we have completed. In fact, often times we find that most of the things we accomplish go unnoticed. The ritual of making lists can often help expand our enjoyment of life. No one can deny the deep satisfaction we get when we are able to complete something. Or, for some, getting away from lists and being in the moment is a way to celebrate the preciousness of life. Take the time to celebrate all you've achieved and enjoyed! 5) Importance of Humor Studies show that humor and laughter can prevent heart disease, boost the immune system and produce cancer fighting cells while making one feel optimistic and energized. It is a lifestyle choice and if it were a pill it would be a miracle drug. Dr. Goodman, director of The Humor Project, defines humor as, "creative self expression that is an attitude, a perspective, a way of looking at life and a way of laughing at life. You can't always control situations around you but you can control your internal responses to them with humor." Laughter activates the release of endorphins in our brains, the bodies own pain-reducing substance. It can raise morale, enhance the immune system, increase oxygen consumption, and benefit our positive connection to others. So, next time you are down, try not to take things too seriously – take a laughative! 6) Positive Attitude and Gratitude The way we think affects all aspects of our lives. It affects our attitude, our behavior, our relationships, and our actions. A positive attitude helps us better deal with the ups and downs of daily life, and particularly with all of the changes associated with aging. A positive attitude manifests in a number of ways, including creative thinking, optimism, and motivation to accomplish our goals. We've all been inspired by stories of those who have been able to overcome enormous obstacles by choosing to have a positive attitude and not giving up. These people are choosing happiness and are looking at problems as blessings in disguise. Believing in ourselves and in our abilities, displaying self-esteem and confidence, we can accomplish great things. The Dalai Lama often talks about the need for us to have confidence in ourselves, "With realization of one's own potential and self-confidence in one's ability, one can build a better world." What we focus on grows. If we dwell on what isn't working, that will increase, yet if we focus on what is working, what we are grateful for, that will increase as well. Practicing gratitude is a powerful way to increase happiness because it reminds us of all that is working in our lives. Consider writing daily in a gratitude journal. Each evening write down three things from that day for which you are grateful. This practice will have an instant physiological effect on your body: your breathing will deepen, your blood flow will be less constricted, and your brain will receive more oxygen. It is like a magic pill. Test it out for yourself - see if it makes a difference in your life. Cultivating the practice of gratitude is a simple reflection that gives great spiritual benefit. It does not deny the difficulties of life we all face, but it will give us a break from feelings of scarcity and fear. Sometimes it is helpful to switch our focus, like changing stations on the television, to the gratitude channel. Try having an attitude of gratitude and see what changes! 7) Spiritual Centering Practice In these chaotic and stressful times it is immensely important for us to pay attention to how we are caring for ourselves. This care includes taking time for our spiritual practice, whatever that might be for us. It may or may not be related to a religious practice. We need to be able to anchor ourselves in the world. Taking time for introspection and contemplation will give us the energy to stay involved in all of the different layers and levels of our lives whether it be our families, our work, or our community. This time of introspection keeps us from being overwhelmed by the tremendous challenges we face today. Our spiritual practice might include daily mediation, yoga, prayer, or time in silence. It might include going to a church, synagogue, mosque, or other religious place. It might include being in nature and talking walks. It might include spending time playing music, singing in a choir, or practicing art. It might include taking time to read good books. Any way that we can spend quality time doing what we love in a way that nurtures us and feeds our soul is very important. We are all spiritual beings having a human experience. 8) Adapting to Loss and Staying Flexible Developing an ability to adapt to loss is something we all have to face. Loss is not a respecter of age. As we age, we will be confronted with many types of loss: the loss of a loved one, a relationship, an animal companion, a job. The list is long. Collectively we feel the stress as we go through major worldwide, cultural change in a postmodern world. It is only natural to want to cling to the old because it is familiar. There are many practices to help us in adjusting to loss. One of them is the feng-shui practice called the nine-day, clutter- clearing practice. For nine consecutive days we either move, throw away, or give away twenty-seven items. This begins to set up an energy of flow in our life. It will bring more spaciousness to our day and for each item we pass on, tapping into the process of letting go. It is important to take a moment to savor the freedom of letting something go. This small practice will help us when it comes to the bigger losses that come to us. Also, being able to stay flexible with the changes that will inevitably occur as we age is very important to our health and well-being. We know our bodies will decline, our memory will lapse, our eyesight will worsen, our emotions might alter, yet this is all a natural part of aging. While we might wish we were younger, or wish these shifts didn't happen, we also need to accept what is and do what we can to make the best of these inescapable passages. Being flexible might mean changing our exercise routine from jogging to walking, lap swims to water aerobics, or adding yoga to stay limber. It might mean cutting back on some activities or commitments to conserve energy and spend more time with family or time reading. Being adaptable means staying in the present and not being stuck wishing for past abilities, relationships or circumstances. Appreciating what is – and adapting to our changing bodies and circumstances - is a gift! 9) Regular Exercise Many of us know the joys of being in the out of doors and communing with nature through many types of physical exercise. We feel more alive, happier and healthier. Regular exercise is good for us in many ways. The Mayo Clinic cites 7 benefits of regular physical activity: a. It improves our mood. A workout at the gym or a brisk 30-minute walk can help us calm down. Exercise stimulates various brain chemicals, which may leave us feeling happier and more relaxed. We'll also look and feel better when we exercise regularly, which can boost our confidence and improve our self-esteem. Exercise even reduces feelings of depression and anxiety. b. Exercise combats chronic diseases. Worried about heart disease? Hoping to prevent osteoporosis? Regular exercise might be the ticket. Regular exercise can help us prevent - or manage - high blood pressure. Our cholesterol will benefit, too. Regular exercise can help us prevent type 2 diabetes, osteoporosis and certain types of cancer. c. Exercise helps us manage our weight. Want to drop those excess pounds? Try walking or other physical activities. When we exercise, we burn calories. Take the stairs instead of the elevator. Walk during your lunch break. Turn off the TV and take a brisk walk. Dedicated workouts are great, but activity we accumulate throughout the day helps us burn calories, too. d. Exercise strengthens our heart and lungs. Winded by grocery shopping or household chores? Regular exercise can leave us breathing easier. Exercise delivers oxygen and nutrients to our tissues. Regular exercise helps our entire cardiovascular system - the circulation of blood through our heart and blood vessels - work more efficiently, giving us more energy to do the things we enjoy. e. Exercise promotes better sleep. Struggling to fall asleep? Or stay asleep? It might help to boost our physical activity during the day. A good night's sleep can improve our concentration, productivity and mood. Regular exercise can help us fall asleep faster and deepen our sleep. f. Exercise can put the spark back into our sex life. Too tired to have sex? Or feeling too out of shape? Regular exercise can leave us feeling energized and looking better, which may have a positive effect on our sex life. Exercise improves our circulation, which can lead to more satisfying sex. And men who exercise regularly are less likely to have problems with erectile dysfunction than are men who don't exercise, especially as they get older. g. Exercise can be fun! Wondering what to do on a Saturday afternoon? Looking for an activity that suits the entire family? Take a ballroom dancing class. Check out a local climbing wall or hiking trail. Push the kids or grandkids on the swings or climb with them on the jungle gym. Plan a neighborhood kickball or touch football game. Find an activity you enjoy, and go for it. If you get bored, try something new. If we're moving, it counts! Exercise helps us feel more alive, happier and healthier! Kimberly Weichel is a social pioneer, educator, author and specialist in global communications, leadership and conflict resolution, assisting individuals and organizations to realize their potential. She is co-author of "Healing the Heart of the World" and director of the Institute for Peacebuilding. www.kimweichel.org. |
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February 2009 Broadcast Schedule
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| The Broadcast Week Beginning Wednesday, February 4-10, 2009
When life becomes impossibly difficult, what does it take to pick yourself up off the floor and face another day? Mark Matousek has learned to survive crisis by studying with the world's great spiritual teachers and by facing his own darkest days. He's also interviewed luminaries from all walks of life, from Jon Kabat-Zinn to Annie Lennox, and learned their stories of devastation and survival. Now he distills all that wisdom into a simple, gentle understanding of what it takes to carry on even when it's hard to remember why you should. He explains, "The truth is that we're hardwired for crisis. What anyone realizes who goes through a seemingly impossible situation is that every time you walk through something you think you can't walk through, you're stronger from it and your bigger from it, and you realize that you have capacities and strengths that you didn't know you had. We're hardwired for this kind of evolution through catastrophe." If you've ever faced a dark night when you weren't sure which way to go, you'll welcome the quiet strength in Mark Matousek's words of recognition. He's been there, too. Mark Matousek is a contributing editor to Tricycle: The Buddhist Review, and O: The Oprah Magazine and has been published in The New Yorker, Harper's, The Utne Reader, Yoga Journal, and many others. He is co-author with Andrew Harvey of Dialogues with a Modern Mystic (Quest Books 1994); author of two award-winning memoires, Sex, Death, Enlightenment: A True Story (Riverhead Books 1997); The Boy He Left Behind: A Man's Search for His Lost Father (Riverhead Books 2000); and When You're Falling, Dive: Lessons in the Art of Living (Bloomsbury 2008). To learn more about the work of Mark Matousek go to www.markmatousek.com Topics Explored in this Dialogue:
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The Broadcast Week Beginning Wednesday, February 11-17, 2009
Elizabeth Schaefer built her career thinking and writing as a scientist—detached, analytical, unemotional. When depression and bipolar disorder derailed her life, and years of hospitalization, medication, and electric shock therapy left her exhausted but still depressed, she began to write about it. For the first time she became acquainted with the language of her own emotion. As she continued to put those emotions down on paper, she discovered a new power over her illness. She explains, "Recognizing those emotions as they come up on the page—which may be different from the recognition that we do without writing—allows us to organize and manage our thoughts better. That managing can then lead to some sense of catharsis, or freeing of some of those emotions, which allows us to then start to resolve them." If you have a lifelong habit of writing in your journal every day or if you've never explored an intimate moment with your thoughts and the written word, Dr. Schaefer offers a host of new possibilities for healing and growth and discovering new wisdom and strength with her insightful techniques for writing your way through the darkness. (Hosted by Justine Willis Toms) Elizabeth Schaefer, Ph.D., holds a doctorate in biological sciences from Stanford University. In 1998 she developed a creative writing course for people with mood disorders for the university's Department of Psychiatry, and continues as the program's facilitator. She is a frequent speaker for the National Alliance on Mental Illness and other organizations, and has written articles for the Stanford News Service, Nature, Newsweek and other periodicals. Dr. Schaefer is the author of Writing Through the Darkness: Easing Your Depression with Paper and Pen (Celestial Arts 2008). To learn more about the work of Elizabeth Schaefer go to www.writingthroughthedarkness.com Topics Explored in this Dialogue:
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| The Broadcast Week Beginning Wednesday, February 18-24, 2009
He's not just another pretty face. He's not even "just" a really good actor. He's a man who walks his talk, and who's had the courage to put his career at risk to speak truth to power and be a voice for the powerless. You know Mike Farrell from his role in the groundbreaking television series, M.A.S.H,. and as the gentle father and veterinarian on Providence. You may not know he's an activist as well, and has spent decades working on behalf of human rights and against the death penalty. In this interview you'll hear the story of his evolution as an actor, with intimate tales of Anthony Quinn and Alan Alda, and even Mr. Farrell's personal encounter with the "casting couch." You'll also get to know another side of the man who has become a cultural icon, and hear of his commitment to preserving the dignity of every human being. He explains, "We have so confused ourselves and stood our values on their heads to the degree that we've given up any notion of inspiring our young people to the point where they can fully realize their potential, instead of which we are busy slamming people into dehumanizing institutions." His strong words are made all the more powerful by the calm certainty you've come to know so well, and you may find you appreciate his on-screen work even more when you discover that his beauty really is not skin deep at all. Mike Farrell is an actor, writer, director, and producer. He is also a lifelong opponent of the death penalty, and an advocate for human rights, animal rights, immigrants, and the environment. He has worked with Human Rights Watch and similar organizations, serving on delegations to many countries around the world. As president of Death Penalty Focus he does outreach and coordinates efforts to block executions. He is the recipient of more than thirty-seven awards for his work as an activist, including Person of the Year in 2007 from the Los Angeles Times, and was the first annual recipient of the Mike Farrell Human Rights Award in 2006 from Death Penalty Focus. Mr. Farrell is the author of Just Call Me Mike: A Journey to Actor and Activist (Akashic Books 2008). To learn more about the work of Mike Farrell go to www.mikefarrell.org Topics Explored in this Dialogue:
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The Broadcast Week Beginning Wednesday, February 25 - March 3, 2009
The teachings of Buddhism tell us we are all enlightened now, in this moment. But when you're facing hardship or loss, your courage has waned, and happiness seems an unattainable goal, it's difficult to remember to stop striving and just "be here now." Za Rinpoche understands this, and lends his Tibetan wisdom to our Western ways, for a new understanding of what it means to free yourself from suffering—or struggling, as he defines it—so that you can enter your own happiness with the same simple intent with which you point your curser and click your mouse. He tells us, "When you are being in the moment, you will realize that you are just one piece of one whole truth. And not only you, but you will see every other being, every other thing, is also part of this one whole thing. So you will lose the sense of ego, but you will get a sense of wholeness. And when you get this sense of unity, that interconnection, you don't have to do things to become a loving person. You will be a very caring, compassionate, loving person just by realizing that unity. That is the perfection of unity." (Hosted by Justine Willis Toms) ZaChoeje Rinpoche was born in Nepal, and at the age of sixteen was recognized by the Dalai Lama as the sixth reincarnation of the fifth ZaChoeje Rinpoche. He received the Geshe Lharampa degree, equivalent to a doctorate in Tibetan Buddhism, from the Drepung Loseling Monastery, and in 2001 helped to found the Emaho Institute in Phoenix, Arizona. Za Rinpoche is co-author with Ashley Nebelsieck of The Backdoor to Enlightenment: Eight Steps to Living Your Dreams and Changing Your World (Three Leaves Press 2007). To learn more about the work of Za Choeje Rinpoche go to www.emahofoundation.org Topics Explored in this Dialogue:
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Small Pleasures : Finding Grace in a Chaotic World by Justine Willis Toms Justine Willis Toms' new book Small Pleasures : Finding Grace in a Chaotic World. To get your copy click here. It makes a perfect gift. Justine Toms is doing a book signing and talk on Thursday, February 5, 2009 at 7:00 p.m. at: Copperfield's Books 140 Kentucky Street Petaluma, CA 94952 707-762-0563 |
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